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The Myth of the Good Divorce: Shattering the Illusion of a Painless Split

Ralph Waldo Emerson

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Published in Torn Asunder: Children The Myth Of The Good Divorce And The Recovery Of Origins

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A Family Torn Apart By Divorce Torn Asunder: Children The Myth Of The Good Divorce And The Recovery Of Origins

Torn Asunder: Children, the Myth of the Good Divorce, and the Recovery of Origins

by Michael Luetchford

4.8 out of 5

Language	:	English
File size	:	2053 KB
Text-to-Speech	:	Enabled
Enhanced typesetting	:	Enabled
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Screen Reader	:	Supported
Print length	:	317 pages

In the realm of family relationships, divorce has long been shrouded in misconceptions and unspoken truths. One pervasive myth is the notion of the "good divorce"—a clean, amicable split that leaves everyone, especially the children, unscathed. However, as Dr. Arik Levinson, renowned family therapist and author of the groundbreaking book, "Children: The Myth of the Good Divorce and the Recovery of Origins," reveals, this idyllic scenario is far from the reality.

The Hidden Trauma of Divorce on Children

In his meticulously researched and compassionately written book, Dr. Levinson unveils the profound and often overlooked impact of divorce on children. Drawing upon decades of clinical experience, he argues that even the most "amicable" separations disrupt children's sense of stability, security, and belonging.

Children of divorce experience a range of emotions, including sadness, anger, confusion, and fear. They may struggle to adjust to their new living arrangements, relationships with their parents, and the division of their family. Some may exhibit behavioral problems, anxiety, or depression as a result of the stress and uncertainty they face.

The Myth of Resilience

Another prevalent misconception is that children are inherently resilient and can bounce back from divorce without significant long-term consequences. While it is true that some children do adjust well, Dr. Levinson emphasizes that this is the exception rather than the rule.

The impact of divorce on children varies depending on numerous factors, including the age of the child, the circumstances of the split, and the level of support they receive. However, research consistently shows that children of divorce are more likely to experience academic difficulties, relationship problems, and mental health issues later in life.

The Path to Recovery

While divorce can be a traumatic experience for children, it is not an insurmountable one. Dr. Levinson offers a path to recovery that involves:

* Validation and support: Children need to know that their feelings are valid and that they are not alone. Parents, family members, and therapists can provide a safe space for children to express their emotions and receive unconditional love. * Family therapy: Family therapy can help children and parents navigate the challenges of divorce, improve communication, and rebuild relationships. * Recovery of origins: Dr. Levinson introduces the concept of "recovery of origins," a process that helps children understand the history of their family and the factors that led to their parents' divorce. This can help them make sense of their past and develop a sense of belonging and identity.

The "good divorce" myth is a dangerous illusion that obscures the real impact of divorce on children. By shattering this myth, Dr. Arik Levinson empowers parents, therapists, and children to confront the challenges of divorce head-on and pave the way for healing and recovery.

"Children: The Myth of the Good Divorce and the Recovery of Origins" is an essential read for anyone who has been touched by the complexities of divorce. It provides hope, guidance, and a profound understanding of the enduring power of family bonds.

Torn Asunder: Children, the Myth of the Good Divorce, and the Recovery of Origins

by Michael Luetchford

4.8 out of 5